Gender is a social construct. That’s not to say it’s neither real nor important, especially in a society obsessed with policing gender — money is a social construct, and in a capitalist society its impacts are both very real and very important.
Further, being told what our gender is and means can cause dissonance and distress, and I don’t believe it’s based on conflict with some hidden ‘true’ gender. The way the term is used now is a clunky conflation of numerous factors, from gender-presentation to sex, and as these terms are more rigorously identified and separated, ‘gender’ has less and less meaning.
In a genderless society, trans and non-binary people would still exist, and for those that wished to transition the issue would be treated as an endocrine disorder, rather than a psychiatric one. Why is this? Because the idea of a binary and immutable/innate sex is also a social construct.
While separating ‘sex’ and ‘gender’ is a useful Trans 101 description, I think it reinforces a false dichotomy (the ‘body’ and ‘mind’ being separate entities), and devalues the self-identification of trans/non-binary people (‘your gender is female but your sex is male’ is the ‘politically correct’ way of saying ‘you think you’re a woman but you’re actually a man’).
Beyond this, the way ‘sex’ is used is completely lacking in nuance, and fails to reflect the diversity of humanity. Sex conflates a large number of variables into one title — gonads, chromosomes, genital, hormones, secondary sex characteristics, possibly brain structure — while failing to recognise that these are all distinct and meaningful concepts in and of themselves.
For example, if I am getting an abdominal x-ray, my doctor needs to know where my gonads are, they don’t need to know whether I’m ‘male’ or ‘female’; if I’m growing a distressing amount of hair, my endocrinologist needs to know my testosterone levels are, they don’t need to know whether I’m ‘male’ or ‘female’. Ultimately, ‘sex’ is a categorisation used to enforce social norms far more often than it is to convey useful information about a person.
Gender and sex are social constructs, and upon deconstruction may turn out to be completely useless (and it’s my opinion that they are); however, in a world where both of these constructs exist, they are still real, they are still important, and the identification of individuals on both counts needs to be respected.